ive depth enough to relay
how truly sorry, that i am
for surely causing a rift
that would cause us to drift
but ive no idea what to say
to make up to you today
i need you in my life again
with out you its not the same
im sorry and i was wrong
i want to try to get a long
so please forgive and forget
for im filled of deep regret...
.....im dying inside...i dont know how im gonna take all of this..then again..i can't blame anyone but myself...here i am..feeling so damn miserable...while he's there...having the time of his time..unfair isnt it?..but thats how life is..maybe only mine is...at times i couldn't breathe..i feel like there's no strength in me anymore...dont know how im gonna face another day without him by my side...im willing to give it all..the bad thing is..he isnt...i dont know how i'll get him back..i probably NEVER would..he's mad as hell...ive given all my efforts...swallowed my pride..i think there's no pride left in me...i wanna die...i wanna give up....the sad thing is..i never expected that ill fall in love with him....but i did...damn...i fell hard!!!im missing him badly..though i know he's not even thinking of me...how could i be so stupid to let him go...and its true..sometimes you can't have them back....in a couple of weeks im finally letting him go..why?..not because i got tired of loving him...(hell i never would!!!)but because there's no point if i stayed...the pain is killing me...and can't feel this way anymore..im giving up because he already have...im holding on to NOTHING....but i still love him...at this point im still willing to give it a try....well..i can only speak for myself..i dont even know why im still pushing myself to someone i know doesn't nid me..honestly..now i think he doesnt even know i exist....sad...i know..painful...like hell....but thats what love is!!!and thats what makes loving a challenge....we know at one point we'll get hurt..we'll cry...it could even destroy us...but u see..for some it works....the lucky ones..and you know what..i believe i was a part of those lucky ones....i was just so stupid because i didnt see it...i didnt know how lucky i was because i had you...and yeah..jet...you are right..this is karma...my karma...
i still dont know how im gonna get through this...how ill recover from all this...i just wish im like you...you should've killed me while i was still in your arms......
Currently listening to: the sound of silence
Currently feeling: contemplative